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icemtn17@icemtn17
3 hours ago
From "The Babylon Bee"
Police Instantly Disperse 'Teen Takeover' By Firing Job Applications Into Crowd
CHICAGO, IL — Local police successfully dispersed the mob at a "teen takeover" event in the downtown area Friday night by firing thousands of job applications directly into the crowd.
The incident initially involved hundreds of youth blocking traffic, blasting music, and filming TikTok dances on top of city buses. Witnesses said that the scene shifted instantly when police unloaded with stacks of entry-level job applications.
"It was panic, wonderful, wonderful panic," said Officer Marcus Martinez. "The moment those sheets of paper hit the air, the crowd scattered in absolute terror. Not one of them would touch an application. Chick-fil-A, McDonald's, Taco Bell. No one there wanted anything to do with them."
Aerial footage showed dozens of teenagers fleeing the scene in horror, some covering their eyes to avoid catching a glimpse of an actual job application.
"I almost got hit by one," said visibly shaken 17-year-old Brayden Taylor. "It asked for 'relevant experience.' I don't even know what that means, bro. I'm just trying to film a TikTok dance, not explain where I see myself in five years. This is police brutality."
At publishing time, police had reportedly dispersed another takeover crowd by threatening to take all the teens' phones away for 30 minutes.
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00:01:34
Starmer Resigns
The UK People have Spoken!
Your Voices were heard!
Kier Starmer Resigns!🥳🥳🥳
"I will resign as leader of the Labour Party..."
"I have spoken to His Majesty - the King to inform him of my decision..."
Would that be King Trump??? 👑
Congratulations UK...a New Country unfolds!!!
00:00:21
00:02:51
MILITARY INTEL EXPOSES IT
For years they laughed when we said the system was rigged. They called it conspiracy theory. They told us to move on and accept the results.
👉 Not anymore.
President Trump is now laying bare the repeatable fraud system that was run across multiple states
👉 Georgia, Arizona, California, and beyond.
This wasn’t sloppy mistakes or isolated incidents. This was a coordinated, professional operation with a proven playbook that was tested and refined over time.
The pattern is crystal clear once you stop looking at single states in isolation. 👍
The same software vulnerabilities were exploited. The same ballot harvesting networks operated with minimal pushback. The same late-night ballot dumps flipped tight races. The same suppression of real-time data and chain-of-custody breakdowns occurred in key counties.
👉 Military intelligence and corroborating information from within the agencies themselves are now confirming what patriots have been screaming about for ...
Good Morning Ohana! 😊☕️🌸
I’m back in the office today and I work with a bunch a$$holes in other agencies. It’s taking me twice as much getting my work done. I’m praying for the EBS or the National Security Emergency to go off. I’m tried working for the blue state. Carry on and have a nice day.
Happy Tremendous Tuesday Ohana!
Make it a great day in the way only you know how!😊💕🌹🌳🌻🌵☕🫖🎶🎶🎼🎵
PS I will be turning off my lap top at noon (Pacific Daylight Time) today as we start our trip to Mt. Shasta and the redwoods. We'll return home on Friday the 24th. So this will be a pause and reset away from the news and communications.
